A personal journey and testimonial from one of my patients:
“My husband and I were married for 5 years before we were able to have intercourse due to my vaginismus. There was nothing traumatic in my past but for some reason, even though I wanted sex, I mentally avoided “that area” of my body and didn’t even admit to myself that there was a problem for a long time, even though I was never able to put tampons in. Once I finally opened my eyes up to the fact that I had a problem, I had a surgery that was supposed to fix the issue.
It allowed me to put small tampons in but intercourse was still impossible and very far out of reach. Eventually I connected with Heather for physical therapy and was able to start making real progress. Heather made me feel very comfortable in that awkward environment. She taught me that I basically had “knots” built up, just as you would get a “knot” in your neck, and that they had to be worked out by applying pressure regularly. It took me about 3 months from starting the physical therapy until we were able to have intercourse for the first time. I had physical therapy sessions 3 times a week, which helped me overcome it quicker. Sex therapy sessions with Joyce Penner, along with her book “Restoring the Pleasure,” were also very helpful during that time period. The book contained sexual exercises that helped take the pressure off of sex so that we could just enjoy each other’s bodies without that frustrating aspect hanging over our heads.
Vaginismus.com also provided a support group where I could chat with others dealing with the same issue, and helped me realize I wasn’t alone. Once we were able to have sex, it still was tight and a little painful, and it took awhile to completely get better, but over a couple years it got better and better. It’s not an issue at all anymore. We now have 2 little boys and are enjoying the sexual aspect of our marriage in a way that I never thought I would. My advice to someone going through this therapy would be to just never give up faith and hope that you can overcome it, because it IS possible, and the outcome is definitely worth all that discomfort and frustration!” – M.M.
